We spent the afternoon going over many different topics and relevant cases covering the OB-Gyn service in preparation for our upcoming shelf exam. Sometimes I feel like I have so much to learn that I will never be able to know enough. I haven't had any problems with the exams, in fact I've done well so far this year, but I still feel like I don't know anything. I remember not so long ago when I thought I was the smartest person in my high school. Then I went on to think I was one of the very smartest in college (I have the grades to back these claims up). But then I started medical school, surrounded by people just like me who have always been All-A Students, top of the class, well-known for being gifted intellectually, and I realized that I'm not all that special. There are loads of people with good grades, who are incredibly smart, and now I compare myself against them. And suddenly I'm not the only smart one, and I feel like a failure. When you're used to always being correct without much effort and you suddenly switch to getting questions wrong here and there, it feels horrible. I don't know how I will ever know all that there is to know as a physician. But I do know that I will never know it if I don't have confidence in myself...so I'm working on that. It's just ironic that my high school classmates would talk about how I was so arrogant about being smart, and here I am, the truth comes out, I'm not arrogant at all. Give it a few years, then maybe I will be!haha you know, the whole "doctor-god complex"! ;)
We went to a few parks to walk the dog after work. Marley had a great time.
Mike's appointment went well this morning, his fingerprints and photographs went through without any problems. Let's hope the rest of the application finishes soon!
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