Inner City Hospital

I almost can't believe that it's already August 18th, but here we are! I've spent the last 18 days tending to the needs of an inner city, community hospital. Things have been a bit crazy, and I can definitely say that I am so happy to be doing my residency where I am (in an academic institution outside of the urban area). I have seen some crazy things already, and I've become so much wiser in social issues than before.

One of the many major differences in this hospital than the one in which I typically train is that the internists are the primary team for stroke patients. You may recall my serious disinterest I have towards stroke; Honestly, hemorrhagic strokes freak me out and I feel incredible inadequate and insignificant when I care for patients with this problem. It's not that I'm cold hearted or don't like to deal with end of life situations, that is not the case at all. There is just something so terrifying about hemorrhagic strokes...and the fact that we can offer very little management for this problem. I feel so unhelpful, and like such a failure since all I can offer is support, empathy, and compassion.

I have actually a lot of complaints about my current rotation, but I won't bore you with all of that. I'm learning, I have a lot of independence in patient care, and I'm gaining valuable experience. I am not getting much in terms of guidance, feedback, or encouragement, but I'm figuring things out on my own which is definitely reassuring. I surprise myself constantly at some of the things I know, and how quickly and confidently I am managing problems.

I'll be starting on night float in a few short weeks. I can't wait for all of the procedures and responsibility - I'm going to learn so much in such a short time, I am so excited!

Now I just need to find some more time in the day to sleeppppp....

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..........................................